insert miata joke here
You do not do things by half measures, do you?!?Ok. Full disclosure, I have not read all of the posts yet, so not sure if someone already has/recommended this one. Also, I'm a girl (though I happen to love anal), so I can only say this one is a pleaser in my experience and have not tested it on a man....yet.... 😉
Ladies and gentlemen, let me introduce THE INTENSITY 2.0! This pumped up, muscle stimulating, electrode pulsing, vibrating beauty is worth 👏 every 👏 penny 👏.
Ladies: feeling all loosie goosie? Tired of wearing out your muscles double clicking your own mouse? Lose track of your kegal count and just say "fuck it!" (But obviously not in a good way?) Maybe pop out a few kin and now pee a little when you sneeze? Wishing you didn't ink every time you got a bear hug?
.... well your new best damned friend is here. Lube this slot Rocket up, stick it in, pump pump pump it up to size (when it doesn't fall out on its own and you feel nice and full, you know it's pumped to your size), and turn up the volume on your TV cause you'll be screaming in minutes. It exercises your pelvic floor, tightens everything, vibrates all the spots that you didn't even know you had, and gets you off at the same time.
Gentlemen: you might not think this is for you, but hear me out... been experiencing a little less snap in your dragon? Has the elastic worn out in your fourth eye? Maybe notice a bit more unintended spillage before you can make it to the Loo? Well hell, this is for you too. This baby will work the chute and vibrate your ladder. Your soldier will be at full salute with this baby hitting your prostate. You'll be milked from the inside and will feel like a new woman...err..man...in no time.
Gurlz... bow down to the GOD of all toys!!
![]()
Wanna go halvsies on a double ended taco teaser?Ok. Full disclosure, I have not read all of the posts yet, so not sure if someone already has/recommended this one. Also, I'm a girl (though I happen to love anal), so I can only say this one is a pleaser in my experience and have not tested it on a man....yet.... 😉
Ladies and gentlemen, let me introduce THE INTENSITY 2.0! This pumped up, muscle stimulating, electrode pulsing, vibrating beauty is worth 👏 every 👏 penny 👏.
Ladies: feeling all loosie goosie? Tired of wearing out your muscles double clicking your own mouse? Lose track of your kegal count and just say "fuck it!" (But obviously not in a good way?) Maybe pop out a few kin and now pee a little when you sneeze? Wishing you didn't ink every time you got a bear hug?
.... well your new best damned friend is here. Lube this slot Rocket up, stick it in, pump pump pump it up to size (when it doesn't fall out on its own and you feel nice and full, you know it's pumped to your size), and turn up the volume on your TV cause you'll be screaming in minutes. It exercises your pelvic floor, tightens everything, vibrates all the spots that you didn't even know you had, and gets you off at the same time.
Gentlemen: you might not think this is for you, but hear me out... been experiencing a little less snap in your dragon? Has the elastic worn out in your fourth eye? Maybe notice a bit more unintended spillage before you can make it to the Loo? Well hell, this is for you too. This baby will work the chute and vibrate your ladder. Your soldier will be at full salute with this baby hitting your prostate. You'll be milked from the inside and will feel like a new woman...err..man...in no time.
Gurlz... bow down to the GOD of all toys!!
![]()
This baby will work the chute and vibrate your ladder.
I’m still thinking trampas in a wig. That definitely seems like the kind of thing he’d be into![]()
That inflatable bastard has a damned razer built into it. I've been zapped by one, no way that thing is going anywhere near my nether regions for pleasure.
I believe it's an ADA thing. Websites must comply with ADA too.what's with the handicapped logo lol
This thing works so well you won't be able to walk for a week!what's with the handicapped logo lol
Nah, jokes aside, I got excited thinking it was a boner on the handicap. Zoomed in and was sorely disappointed to find out its supposed to be a damn laptop. Bummer for the wheelchair dude emojiThis thing works so well you won't be able to walk for a week!
At this point, it depresses me to know how disappointed you'll be if I deny it. 🤔😆I’m still thinking trampas in a wig. That definitely seems like the kind of thing he’d be into![]()
At this point, it depresses me to know how disappointed you'll be if I deny it. 🤔😆
Wanna go halvsies on a double ended taco teaser?
Prude...(crickets)
Ah, shit. Missed one. But heck it looks like you've already taken your half plus some. Relax, breathe, Pull it out a bit and then we can share.Prude...
No she doesn't, to the point of fear sometimes 😅🤣You do not do things by half measures, do you?!?
Peaches moving into a new neighborhood:
Wow. That's hot. A 3-minute man. Definitely something you should start using as a pick-up line.We are both done in three minutes tops, never had the need for toys really. Same with previous gfs. If you have a fat dick and skill - it's all you'll ever need.
23 years. Damnit, Monkeys, if I'm gonna serve time, at least give me credit for all time served!! 🤣😘😘No she doesn't, to the point of fear sometimes 😅🤣
Its been 20 years, she hasn't killed me yet.
He says this every time the topic comes up. The more time I get to spend with my wife naked, the better. 3 minutes and I would be disappointed!Wow. That's hot. A 3-minute man. Definitely something you should start using as a pick-up line.
What he’s leaving out is that’s how long the neighbors goat will stand still.Wow. That's hot. A 3-minute man. Definitely something you should start using as a pick-up line.