I have had at length discussions with my wife about this.
We bought our current home with 50% equity. Just a couple of years later out of nowhere we're at like 80%. This means NOTHING. "But we could sell and have this giant wad of cash to buy our 'dream house'".... you're not getting it... the magic 150k that fell out of the sky and landed on our house, also landed on everyone else's house. We're going to sell a 250k house for 400k... then go buy a 280k house for 450k. You're not mathing. Get out your fucking calculator.
The retarded value increase works fine when you've inherited a place to move to that you're going to remodel, or building a shop house out in the sticks and you're doing half the work, moving to off grid cabin, moving from SoCal to flyover country etc. If you're selling a normal house to buy a different normal house, it's zero help.
It took a few tries, but she finally got it.