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The Irate list of advice for teenaged boys

I only have a daughter but she's more bad ass than any boy. When she was a teen my favorite advise was hear me now, believe me later. We have now reached the point where she often says "you were right". :grinpimp:
 
Most of my dad's lessons were centered around knowing when to shut the fuck up and listen. Also, he was very clear that if we ever got in a physical fight, he was kicking me square in the nuts as hard as he could at the first opportunity because he's too old to fight.

I did learn a lot over the years about dealing with a crazy person watching his relationship with my mom, I think we both could've used advice on avoiding that in the first place.

A good one (that I didn't heed) from my buddy that's on his 3rd wife. Never move in with a chick that (a) You've been with for less than a year, and (b), can't support herself.
 
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I got two that I remember off the tip of my head: One is dont get married before the age of 30, there is alot of life to live out there. Two is be the best at whatever you are doing or want to do. If you are a shoe shine, be the very best shoe shine. If you are a deck hand on a boat, be the best deck hand your captain has ever seen.
 
Advice I wish I'd have listened to, use your brain not your body. Welding just like my dad and starting to fall apart just like him too
 
dntsdad said:
Man, my dad never told me anything that stuck. We get along fine but now I gots the sads. :frown:
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Yeah me neither. I love my dad, but if it wasn't for my mum, he'd have a sweet truck and a shitty apartment. I only realized he was an example of what not to do in my early 30s.

Actually, he did give me a couple pieces of advice. One was regarding shooting moose; "in the neck and on the road."
The other was regarding fighting, it was brought up when weapons started being used when I was in high school. The lesson was to assume that everyone is going to try to kill you if you're fighting them, so remember that there are no rules. Wear boots, kick them in the balls, kick them in the knees, punch for the throat, grab fingers and break them. When they go down, keep kicking until they stop trying to get up.

I've never shot a moose, and I'm not a big fan of fighting.
 
dntsdad said:
Man, my dad never told me anything that stuck. We get along fine but now I gots the sads. :frown:
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I read this thread to see what I missed. My dad went back to jail about 1970. I saw him once, just before he died, about five years ago. I learned from better men than him. Top notch role models from the Kingsmen MC club. Friends you could count on. Colorful childhood.

.
 
Squamch said:
Yeah me neither. I love my dad, but if it wasn't for my mum, he'd have a sweet truck and a shitty apartment. I only realized he was an example of what not to do in my early 30s.

Actually, he did give me a couple pieces of advice. One was regarding shooting moose; "in the neck and on the road."
The other was regarding fighting, it was brought up when weapons started being used when I was in high school. The lesson was to assume that everyone is going to try to kill you if you're fighting them, so remember that there are no rules. Wear boots, kick them in the balls, kick them in the knees, punch for the throat, grab fingers and break them. When they go down, keep kicking until they stop trying to get up.

I've never shot a moose, and I'm not a big fan of fighting.
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I feel that he DID offer solid advice. :flipoff2:
 
step dad from 4-14 years old "Boy if you had brains you'd be dangerous"
 
Don’t tell him “if you show me pics of your girlfriend, I’ll show you pics of mine”? :confused::grinpimp::lmao:
 
Never do a job you wouldn't put your name on.

Something I struggle with daily with new employees. Seems like the new wave thinks that you do shitty work to prove that you should be paid more...
 
Never say "It's not my fault, always something YOU can do to change the outcome."
Not really a saying but -> you can go along ways but doing doing a little at a time slowly. More from snow wheeling back in the day and going forward and backwards inches at a time vs flooring it.
"Inch is as good as a mile" Also mostly wheeling.
 
Never weld in sandals
Assume the other guy is going to do something stupid and you'll never be wrong
Don't date fat chicks
Trust your gut
Never get involved in a land war in Asia
Unplug it before you work on it
Dont waste money on cheap tires
If you have to ask, you can't afford it
Remember, tattoos are permanent
 
Buy once, cry once - for most anything. Especially tools.
 
My advice I give most teens. Other people's kids. None of my own.
"Live at home as long as you possibly can. You'll be so much better off."
One of my friends his son works hard, top of the pay scale at work, new trucks, trailers etc, probably over 800 credit. Now whenever I see them I tell him to "buy a damn house and move out already" if his mom is around. If she's not around I laugh with him about how cheap it is to live at home.
 
My dad use to tell me....

"You can't fool the one, that fools you all the time."; when ever I tried to second guess him....
 
I know my pops has taught me alot of things but I can't think of a one liner that he's given me :confused:

I'll have to think on this for a bit
 
With Boys you worry about "one"

dick .........With Girls you worry about "them all ".

Parents with boys and girls ..... well 'ur fucked .
 
My Dad taught me and my brother more that I could sum up here. But a few one liners include:

Prepare for the worse, hope for the best and you’ll be prepared either way.

If there isn’t time to do it right the first time, there will be the second time. (similar to what several other posters have mentioned)

Don’t argue with an idiot, people might not know the difference.

Opportunity knocks once, be ready for it.

Not one liners, but by doing it, he taught us to never be afraid of hard work and to always do a good job. Most people aren’t willing to work hard, so that makes you stand out. Think it isn’t true? Fine a teenaged boy that will do yard work for a day, show up on time and not screw around and come back another day. If you find one, he’s one in a hundred and probably has a Dad like mine was.

A sad reality a lazy (but not stupid) boss of mine told me “Not everyone is willing to work as hard as you do.” It’s sad because he’s right. I thought about why he told me that. It was because I expected that if I always took the 2 am and weekend emergency calls and worked OT whenever the task at hand needed it, that it wasn’t unreasonable of me to expect the same from others. I was wrong and he was right. Figured that out halfway though a career.

A better boss of mine told me “Everyday is an interview.” right after he offered me a promotion without the formality of an interview, which is nearly unheard of in my line of work.

My Dad was right to be sure. I wish I had told him that. For those of you that still can, do it.
 
I'll pass on some wisdom from my old man and those before:
  • It's just as easy to marry a rich girl as it is a poor girl.
  • You'll end up marrying who you date, so it's not a bad idea to date rich girls.
  • Don't marry a girl if she's from a place you really hate. If she's really close to her mother, it's almost guaranteed she'll want to move back near her mother when she starts having kids. I've seen dentists, doctors, and other professionals lose 20 year practices simply because their wife demanded to live near her mother in another state. You either red eye commute on the weekends or you give it all up and move. (I married a girl from the next town over!)
  • Meet your potential mother in law before making any commitments. A great mother in law is a dream, a bad one is worse than your worst nightmare. (I have the best mother in law in the world)
  • Since you'll end up marrying who you date, don't date crazy, no matter how much fun crazy might be.
  • If you see a really hot chick and determine that she's "out of your league", you're doing it wrong. Don't limit her choices, she might be thinking that you're the one who's out of her league. Go for it every time and don't sell yourself short.
  • Money won't buy you happiness, but it sure can make living in misery comfortable.
  • Big girls need love too and they're usually good cooks
  • The old man retired as a Highway Patrolman and told me this: Don't trust any cops EVER. They aren't your friends, they aren't there for your personal interests. They're there to collect evidence of crimes to forward to the D.A. for prosecution. That includes anything you do, even if you're the one who called them to begin with. The cops can't be trusted, and the D.A. is even worse and dishonesty is allowed for them to secure a conviction. The courts have ruled that cops are allowed to lie to gather evidence if needed.
  • Always treat nurses, payroll people, secretaries, and service people with respect. They're the ones who get things done and have access to the boss. If you screw them, you screw yourself. Treat them with some respect and appreciation and they'll bend over backward to help you out.
  • Don't get a girl pregnant unless you're ready to move out and raise 'em yourself. I already raised my kids and won't be raising grandkids. If you're old enough to screw girls like a man, you're old enough to deal with the consequences.
Some of my own:
  • Always CYA. Get someone with more rank to sign off on, or at least to partner with you on critical decisions. When the fur starts to fly, you'll have cover
  • Be honest with your boss. Always assume he knows more than you do and more. He may be asking you questions not because he doesn't know the answer, he may be asking because he wants to hear how you answer him!
  • If it isn't yours, don't touch it, this applies to cash, cars, and women (dudes too for some of you guys)
  • Buy once, cry once. Buy quality and enjoy not having to constantly replace cheap junk.
  • Watch the fog line on foggy days, it's there for a reason.
  • Don't overdrive your headlights, animals are stupid and want to kill you.
  • Never get between a woman and a man, even if he's fighting her. Let the cops deal with it. If you decide to "White Knight" and step in, chances are she'll kill you from behind because she still "loves him" and he's her man. If you do need to get involved, always assume that she'll come at you, so cover your six.
  • Cover up. You will get skin cancer if you get too much sun.
  • You only have one back. Even if you're young and invincible, that power lifting crap and doing crazy squats is pretty risky. It only takes once to permanently screw up your back for life.
  • You can't fix crazy, you can only medicate it.
  • Anything worth doing, is worth doing right the first time.
  • Don't take shortcuts and always prepare for the worst.
  • Always look twice when turning.
  • Don't put your hands where you can't see them. Black widow spiders and snakes lurk in out of the way places.
  • Avoid pinch points and crush zones. Let it swing and stay out of the way.

__
 
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Dad was always at a Bar so didn’t get much out of that.

He did recently admitted at 73 that he was proud of who I’d become and how much he respected my boys, so I guess I got that going for me, which is nice.

Good list fellas, keep it coming for the young Dads.
 
this is a good, easy and short quote that is probably already represented here in many forms

In short, the Stoics set the bar for knowledge very high and were perfectly willing to accept that knowing was the exception, not the rule, in human affairs. The only person we can be sure has any knowledge is the Stoic sage and sages are as rare as the phoenix (Alex. Aph., 61N). Everyone else is equally ignorant
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Etyler2 said:
Dad was always at a Bar so didn’t get much out of that.

He did recently admitted at 73 that he was proud of who I’d become and how much he respected my boys, so I guess I got that going for me, which is nice.

Good list fellas, keep it coming for the young Dads.
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i was with my dad the other day, he was talking about his work. he says they call him old man because he has driven truck longer than they've been alive and he calls them all his kids, because they are like children.

then he looks over at me and says "but your not my kid, I don't have any reason to treat you in that way or feel like i need to talk to you like you were my kid"

so i tell's him "and you might be my dad, but i sure as hell don't need you. I do want you around though"

:laughing:

i guess that is another lesson, respect and mutual respect can take a long damned time to be articulated. don't just assume it isn't there and probably no reason to either force it or get hung up over it.
 
Boss said:
Don't let the door hit you in the ass. ...Yeah, I was loved.
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Pretty much mine as well. From the time I was about 13 I got the "when you turn 18, you are out of here, willingly or with your shit thrown out in the front yard" speech. The only other bit of "advice" I got was "ya'll are nothing but zeroes" said loudly and often by my dad to me, my siblings and my mom. I did not believe either one until I turned 18, didn't have a place to go and my shit wound up in the front yard. Odd birthday put me still in high school at 18. That was the single most contributing factor to me not graduating high school. I simply wasn't prepared to find a place to live, work to support myself and go to high school.
 
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