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Do you have friends that will help?

Squamch

Squamch

Canadian
Joined
May 19, 2020
Member Number
93
Messages
1,569
Loc
republic of Vancouver island
Reading the things you didn't realize thread, and seeing people bitching about not having friends who will help them out.
That idea is foreign to me. Every one of my male friends is a tradesman. Electricians, plumbers, glaziers, carpenters, mechanics, welders, even the truck drivers can do some good work in other arenas. Most of the females or wives will get in there and bust ass when someone needs a roof or new windows, or a deck built, or what have you. We have a chef too who will come out and keep everyone fed.

Is this unusual? Most of these guys I've known for 25-30 years. A lot of us have kids. Everyone is auntie or uncle so and so. The kids listen to every adult when work is going on and mostly stay kinda out of the way.

Its tough to get someone on an hour's notice but if you need something done next weekend, make some calls and half a dozen pickups will be in your driveway at 8am.
 
I got asked a lot more than I asked. Now that I am older, the wife has told them not to ask so much, but you know how that goes.
 
I have an amazingly solid friend group. Everybody does everything for everybody and we don’t keep track. The group is pretty much a Swiss Army knife of talents and knowledge, that’s what makes it nice. If I don’t know how to do something I guarantee one of my buddies does and vice versa. I have a fabrication shop sure if they need something cut or broke or just Steel in general or whatever I can whip it out, several friends are carpenters, lots of electrician/plumber/dirt guys. One of my good friends owns a body shop and we flip a lot of stuff out of there. Just a well rounded group that can make a lot of shit happen because most of us are business owners instead of just employees
 
Well i really just don't have any friends, just allot of people i know. If family asks for help i am there to do whatever is needed. But i do everything i need done myself. If i can't do it or don't want to do it, i hire someone in. I always regret it after the fact thought as i am picky about how i like things done.
 
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last weekend had 2 buddies come out to my place, yard the motor/tranny out of the doner truck, pull the truck out to the field and get my project nova in place and front clip ripped off.
i dont like roofs, so a buddy of mine came out and fixed my whirly bird??? (the roof vent) on my house.
buddy bought a new place, i hauled his quads and jeeps out there for him so he didn't have to make multiple trips (he pulled his boat)
this weekend coming up, loading up a pair of jeeps for buddies to go wheeling a few hours away. my jeep is down and can fit both of theirs on my goose.


i find as i get older my group of friends has gotten smaller, but it has also gotten better. just needed to weed out the clowns.
 
It's a lot different if you live where you grew up, and your friends do also.
having only lived where I do for 5 years, I have few friends. I like it that way. But the few I have are solid dudes. I help them anytime they ask. I rarely ask for help.
 
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We have friends/family that will help if needed. We don't usually ask though. I can rely on my sons to give a hand if I really need it.
 
Sadly moving around the Country a couple of times in the last 10 years has really cut down my group of good people that I grew up with.

Right now I pretty much have to pay for help when I need it.

I know people, and people who would help me out but they are either unskilled and/or work in a restaurant and are never available.

I am on my own for pretty much everything, sometimes it makes me sad.
 
Squamch said:
Reading the things you didn't realize thread, and seeing people bitching about not having friends who will help them out.
That idea is foreign to me. Every one of my male friends is a tradesman. Electricians, plumbers, glaziers, carpenters, mechanics, welders, even the truck drivers can do some good work in other arenas. Most of the females or wives will get in there and bust ass when someone needs a roof or new windows, or a deck built, or what have you. We have a chef too who will come out and keep everyone fed.

Is this unusual? Most of these guys I've known for 25-30 years. A lot of us have kids. Everyone is auntie or uncle so and so. The kids listen to every adult when work is going on and mostly stay kinda out of the way.

Its tough to get someone on an hour's notice but if you need something done next weekend, make some calls and half a dozen pickups will be in your driveway at 8am.
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Fuck you and your utopia!!!!!
:flipoff2:
I got a Brother and few good buds for labor type stuff....
 
I have one non-family friend that will drop everything and be over in 15m tops. He's helped me so many times from towing a rig home to moving an ungodly heavy safe to the basement. I rarely ask for help though. But he's there every time. 100% solid dude.
 
I used to have a circle of friends like that. Now I can't even get a guy to come over for a free meal, forget helping me with something. Moving in your mid 30s is the worst. Ripping up all those roots sucked. Most folks my age have their established social circles and don't have time for someone new.

Oh well. They were good times while they lasted.
 
friends? the ones that help i call family. i have 2 brothers that are only 10min away, and allot of unrealatled family. the rest of blood family is on the other side of the country.

i'm not very social, i dont call anyone just to say hi. but when needed my family is there. my shop/ business burnt down 3yrs ago and i wasn't properly insured... it was horribly depressing, it was a blur, but everyone did what they could. people i hadn't talked to in a year where there for me. i didn't have the money to buy new place, until some of them came over and privately gave me envelopes of cash to repay when i can. only condition was not to tell anyone they had loaned money. it was enough to get the new place.

i know at times before my shop burnt i thought i didn't have anyone that would help, all i did was help others... i was wrong i looked at it the wrong way
 
Wheelin66bronco said:
It's a lot different if you live where you grew up, and your friends do also.
having only lived where I do for 5 years, I have few friends. I like it that way. But the few I have are solid dudes. I help them anytime they ask. I rarely ask for help.
Click to expand...

I live where I was born and raised, but everyone I went to school with left the area. I'm a self proclaimed "jack-of-all-trades"(master of none), so I can and do about everything for myself, and a lot of times get to do other peoples shit for them too. I have enough of my own projects that I just trudge along on getting things done as I get a chance. I don't like hiring people much either because it seems like most people around here just do a shit job and then you're unhappy with their work. Might as well do it yourself...

As mentioned I will call on a cousin or two if I have some concrete to pour, or hire someone if it is something way out of my skill set that I honestly don't even want to try and learn. Had a guy come and install security cameras and set up a network, and have a crew of mexicans that will come do stucco work. Some larger electrical jobs I hire done. I would hire out re-shingling a roof too as that doesn't sound like any fun to me at all... BUT if I were to replace those shingles with a tin roof I might consider doing that myself.

If I need help I'll come on here and ask you assholes some questions. That's about all the help I need usually.
 
I tend to do things solo whenever I can but I have a core group that's ride or die and at least 2 people that'd show up with a shovel to help dispose of evidence if needed.

My family will drop everything at a moment's notice if one of us needs help, we may go weeks without talking but we all live within 30 miles so we can show up quickly.
 
I have plenty of friends who are willing to help, but I have moved around too much in my adult life to have any of them local to me. The closest one is an hour away in Britt, Iowa... And when I moved here last year he drove up one afternoon to help me get the heaviest pieces of furniture upstairs.

I was going to join the American Legion Riders this spring in order to meet some people and have a social circle in this new town, but the Kung Flu put a hold on that. Maybe I will know some locals next year?
 
skinanbones said:
Well i really just don't have any friends, just allot of people i know. If family asks for help i am there to do whatever is needed. But i do everything i need done myself. If i can't do it or don't want to do it, i hire someone in. I always regret it after the fact thought as i am picky about how i like things done.
Click to expand...

That's pretty much where I'm at. I moved away from where I grew up and lost pretty much all my friends in the process. If I can't do it, I hire someone to do it.

I have one friend I talk to pretty regularly, we've been buds since first grade. He understands that if he wants me to come fix his car while he drinks beer it costs him $$$. He's an amusement park mechanic so I guess if I buy a roller coaster and it breaks I can pay him to fix it while I drink beer and we'll be even.
 
I do most things myself. It is usually easier that way.

If I actually need help, it would be something like pouring concrete. I have 3 BILs that will usually show up if I make it convenient for them.
 
M92PV4U said:
I don't ask for help I do everything myself. If I can't do whatever project that I'm working on my self I might call my brother or a brother in law but it's rare.
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I'm the same way, i miss my boys since they flew the nest. My wife read somewhere that people who are like us are that way because of a child hood trauma. Someone in our past showed us we couldn't rely on anyone. Been fun trying to get here to forget about it the last couple weeks! :laughing:
 
xr-nut said:
I'm the same way, i miss my boys since they flew the nest. My wife read somewhere that people who are like us are that way because of a child hood trauma. Someone in our past showed us we couldn't rely on anyone. Been fun trying to get here to forget about it the last couple weeks! :laughing:
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Hmm that's something to think about.

Like others have said most of my childhood friends moved away. The closest one that has more or a different set of skills than me is three hours away.

I also have trust issues with letting other people work on my stuff especially un-supervised.

edit: I have a daughter to help me but she's only two.
 
xr-nut said:
My wife read somewhere that people who are like us are that way because of a child hood trauma. Someone in our past showed us we couldn't rely on anyone. Been fun trying to get here to forget about it the last couple weeks! :laughing:
Click to expand...

maybe for some. For me, I realized that most people are unreliable. They want you to help them at a drop of a hat, but are MIA when I need help. I cut that type of people from my life.
 
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