What's new

Do you go to things your invited to?

If I accept an invitation I try to make it. If I don't want to do something I don't say I'll be there.

My wife used to suffer from social anxiety. So it has been quite a challenge until recently. She's getting over it and now we pretty much go to every social event we're invited to.

As to the OP, it is really frustrating when people flake out last minute. Not a cool move.
 
When we are invited we go even if just for a little while because something came up.

A few years back we hosted a Superbowl party we invited around 20 people total and did it a couple months in advance. We spent the entire day before food prepping and when the time came a total of 4 showed up.:mad3:

To say those that didn't show ever get invited over ever again is an understatement.

Stuff like that is a little different since "everyone" is going to have different plans. Still lame if people said they would be there and didn't show.
 
If I say I'll be somewhere I'll show but I usually respond with something like "theres a really solid 20% chance".

My wife just tells everyone I dont like leaving the house but she will try.
 
Yeah we get invited to stuff, and usually go. If we invite our friends to stuff, they will usually come. Valid excuses like work, sick kids, emergencies come up now and again, but folks don't usually flake.
The rare occasion though...I do have a buddy who flaked on a 10 day moose hunt that we got drawn for. The rest of us went anyway, and don't invite him to apply with us anymore.

And if someone in our group says "I need help with _____" they will have a small army show up with appropriate equipment.
 
Last edited:
Nowadays my wife and I see this stuff with others that are our age (mid-late 30's). Hell a good friend of mine lives on 9 acres behind me and I haven't seen him but once in almost a year. They didn't even bother to show up for my son's 2nd bday party, made some lame excuse about being busy and found out that was a lie.

People are flat out just flaky shitheads.

Been that way for most of my friends since I was about 25. Everyone I hung out with daily/weekly in my early 20's is "busy" now. See a handful of my former close friends once every year or two, but the last time we went and did anything was summer of '18 I think. Most blame it on having kids even though about half of em don't even have full time custody.
 
Mostly, No and for alot of reasons and I really cant go into it here as I would be violating a trust.

We have responsibilitys that not everyone has and its almost impossible to accommodate those issues.
 
Ugh, people get pissy if you don't accept their invites in the first place. Like I don't need an excuse on why I don't feel like going to your shit, I'm not busy or anything, just don't want to...fuck off. And don't ask me "are you free Saturday?" without telling me why you're asking.
 
I don't like to plan anything ...Wife is the exact opposite. I will only go if I don't have to commit and only if it appears spontaneous.:flipoff2:
 
Ya know I personally might go somewhere if invited party or wheeling etc but honestly being in my present condition domestically havent had the opportunity.

And havent wheeled since I twisted by back (herniated 2 discs) driving doubles 11 western.
 
I’ll go if invited. If a friend is going to the trouble of hosting a fiesta, least I could do is show up.

As as others mentioned, if I extend an invite and get a few ‘no’ or no-show, then that person won’t get further invites.
 
My sister threw a bridal shower for me at her house. My MIL and FIL drove 9 hours down for it and my Aunt whom I am not close with drove 4.5 hours for it. ONE of my friends showed up for it. I don't know if I've ever been so embarrassed before. I felt very terrible for my sister who had cooked brunch for probably 20-25 people, decorated, bought prizes for silly games, etc. I hate to sound dramatic, but it was extremely hurtful.
Maybe my sister sent out the invites late, she is the busiest person that I know, or maybe it was a busy weekend for others. Or, maybe I'm just not that liked and I get that. I don't have very many close girl friends and the majority of the close girl friends live out of state/West coast and were coming out for my wedding, so I would not have expected them to make a separate trip just for that. The majority of my friends are guys, so there probably wasn't a large number on the invite list to begin with.

After that, I make it a point to show up. I'm not an overly social person, but I never want somebody to feel the way that I did. In the past year, I think I've gone to 10 visitations for co-workers family members - parents, grandparents, siblings, etc. They're never comfortable, but I never ever regret doing the right thing. I went to one of my employees brothers visitations and he was so moved by it that he gave me an antler handled knife that his brother had made. That meant a lot to me.
 
My wife has extreme social anxiety and we’ve bowed out on events at the last minute multiple times because of it. We don’t get invited to many things anymore.

Unfortunately I believe I have the same issue, mainly because of my hearing loss. It's very difficult to deal with big crowds or multiple people chatting. I envy people who can sit around a fire all night and chat about everything. That just does not work for me.

The invitations have slowly stopped over the years since folks have realized that I hardly ever show but I am always thankful for the thought.

I just keep to myself these days.
 
I've blown off so much shit I don't get invited anymore
 
I get that some people are just antisocial, I'm fine with that and I don't usually invite those people since I know they won't go.

My sister threw a bridal shower for me at her house. My MIL and FIL drove 9 hours down for it and my Aunt whom I am not close with drove 4.5 hours for it. ONE of my friends showed up for it. I don't know if I've ever been so embarrassed before. I felt very terrible for my sister who had cooked brunch for probably 20-25 people, decorated, bought prizes for silly games, etc. I hate to sound dramatic, but it was extremely hurtful.
Maybe my sister sent out the invites late, she is the busiest person that I know, or maybe it was a busy weekend for others. Or, maybe I'm just not that liked and I get that. I don't have very many close girl friends and the majority of the close girl friends live out of state/West coast and were coming out for my wedding, so I would not have expected them to make a separate trip just for that. The majority of my friends are guys, so there probably wasn't a large number on the invite list to begin with.

After that, I make it a point to show up. I'm not an overly social person, but I never want somebody to feel the way that I did. In the past year, I think I've gone to 10 visitations for co-workers family members - parents, grandparents, siblings, etc. They're never comfortable, but I never ever regret doing the right thing. I went to one of my employees brothers visitations and he was so moved by it that he gave me an antler handled knife that his brother had made. That meant a lot to me.

I feel like women are worse than men in this regard also. At least once they get out of the late teens early 20s.

This was a similar deal, just wasn't quite as baron since there was all the husband's and kids.

When we first planned it, it was supposed to be in late May, we had originally planned on possibly getting a large event tent if there was a chance of rain. We had also originally planned on catering.

My sil bought 2 ez ups just for this. Plus a shit ton of food and drinks. Didn't even make a small dent in it.

I would have expected it if it was something for me, but I thought everyone would show up for her. Oh well.





​​​​​​
 
Some of the people I consider my closest friends won’t even text me back when I invite them to stuff.

I’ve spent a lot of money on my boat so me and my friends can enjoy it. If you won’t even text me back, I’ll start taking other friends or friends of friends with. That’s been the norm for this season and we’ve been having a blast. I’ve got to meet some new people, Learning how to wake board.
So if anyone wants to bitch that I’m taking other people out without inviting them, I’ll remind them of the numerous invites they got and never responded.

I've always tried to stick to my word when it comes to engagements. But I’ve also realized I have been way too available as a friend, person and resource for people to mooch off of. I answer my phone much less than I used to, because the people calling would do the same to me. I’m tired of being the first person someone calls when their car is making a funny sound, and the last one called when they’re having a pool party.
 
My friends without kids are the worst. They act like their lives are so busy they can't make whatever I've invited them to. "You have to go let out your dog, so you can't come? You just wait till you have kids, you lazy MF." I have another friend with 6 adopted kids. They load those kids into TWO suvs and it's like the circus comes to town. I bet it takes 2 hours to get them all dressed and ready.
 
My friends without kids are the worst. They act like their lives are so busy they can't make whatever I've invited them to. "You have to go let out your dog, so you can't come? You just wait till you have kids, you lazy MF." I have another friend with 6 adopted kids. They load those kids into TWO suvs and it's like the circus comes to town. I bet it takes 2 hours to get them all dressed and ready.

“Well we gotta go home and take care of the dogs” excuse. Seriously? You gotta go home and put the dogs in the backyard until bedtime when you let them back in.

Im glad I’ve got my dog well adjusted enough that she goes with me to most social occasions. My friend’s wife actually got mad at me for not bringing her to their daughters first birthday party. :laughing:
 
I go to the occasional family gathering or BBQ at friends' houses other than that I don't really like going to weddings, parties (I quit drinking years ago), kid's birthdays, etc. If I don't want to go I just politely tell them I'll pass and if they press for a reason why, I just tell them straight up that I would be bored and just don't want to go - no need to BS them.
 
Man some of you guys must be some serious loners. I try and make most everything we are invited too. I don’t leave my house much so if there is a reason I’m out of here.

I have also learned that I get more business if I go out and mingle with people. Fairs, polka dances, baseball games, I try and attend and talk to as many people as possible. I usually can drum up enough conversations with people I know just in passing to more than pay for the evening out. One of the most successful guys in my business is a social butterfly and I’m trying the emulate him lol. It’s all about the people you know lol.
 
I have enough shit to do I don't need to go anywhere other than home, the farm, or the shop. I go to some family events, but if I'm swamped with shit to do at the time I'll keep right on working and not even feel one bit bad about not making it. That being said I usually don't get personally invited to stuff it's more often than not my wife or mother telling me about this shit and "make it if you can." And I don't commit to stuff unless I actually plan on going.

photo11607.jpg
 
ok, so say they came, what changes?
you have a couple sitting in the corner talking to the only other 2 people they know. They know you and your wife, but you don’t have time to spend your whole party babysitting them. So how many minutes of interaction did you really miss?


If I have to RSVP, chances are I won’t go. Or I should say I won’t except the invitation. I have this whole fear of commitment thing.

if i say i’ll go, i’ll go.
 
i am having a pig roast on aug 1st
sent out invitations asking for rsvp.....
no one has actually rsvp by calling, but when i talk to them and ask if the got invitation, they say yes, and they are coming. then i have to follow up with how many. in this day of cell phones, just farking call and rsvp
 
“Well we gotta go home and take care of the dogs” excuse. Seriously? You gotta go home and put the dogs in the backyard until bedtime when you let them back in.

Im glad I’ve got my dog well adjusted enough that she goes with me to most social occasions. My friend’s wife actually got mad at me for not bringing her to their daughters first birthday party. :laughing:

No shit, our friends group gatherings have a 1:1 kid:dog ratio. Toss up which group causes more issues:laughing:
 
Top Back Refresh