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Do you go to things your invited to?

YotaAtieToo

Thick skull
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If someone invites you to an event, like something that is planned in advance, food is provided, ect, do you your best to make it?

I don't mean like, "hey I'm having a BBQ later I invited everyone I know, you should swing by" but something more personal.

How about canceling, what kind of situation does it take for you to cancel?

My wife graduated with a bachelor degree this year, she took some time off to raise our boys, but decided to go back after a 6 year hiatus after a fire took out our town and we had plans to move out of the area. She did 2 semesters while still having to be a full time mom of 3 boys (1, 2 and 7) and running her photography business.

Her parents, sister and I decided to throw a surprise graduation party for her. We invented about 30 of her closest friends and family weeks in advance.

One friend drove 4 hours by herself with a 6 month old baby.

Another buddy woke up early this morning, drove 30 mins, worked 4 hours drove 30 mins home then 45 mins back to the party.

Out of the 3 couples we invited that are supposed to be our closer friends, 2 said they'd be there and 1 said they would try.

The one who said she would try invited my wife up to see their new house on Thursday(about 90 mins way up in the middle of nowhere) . My wife being the woman she is, packs the 3 boys up and heads out, just to hang out for a few hours.

This chick says she can't make it to the party since they "just drove down the hill" and 2 trips in 2 days would be too much. Then turns around and invites my wife to come up there next weekend, :rolleyes:

Another couple were supposed to be there and just said they couldn't make it this morning, which I'm pretty sure was only because we had to change locations from my in laws place to my sister in laws place because in laws place ac broke and it was 100* today.

Last couple had a semi legitimate excuse, some wack job in their rural neighborhood was threatening people with a gun and had some type of standoff with the cops. However, these people have more guns than anyone I know, so I'm sure they were safe.

It also ended before the party was over, and they still didn't bother to show. They also basically flake on any plans anyway.

Anyway, sorry for the rant. :flipoff2:

I was just curious how everyone else is with events.

I'm the type where if I'm invited to something, I try my hardest to make it. Even if it's just a "hey we'll be camping here, swing by, but especially a circumstance like this, it's not a holiday weekend or something where you might have other plans. I just feel like if someone thought of me when they were going down their list, the least I can do is show up.

Then, once I say I'll be there, I'm going to be there unless a family emergency comes up. I absolutely hate flaking, but if for some reason I have to, I will at least call and tell them I can't make it and why. Instead of just not showing up.

Do people not realize that food was bought for them because they said they'd be there?

Does anyones word mean anything these days?


I would have expected this for an event for me since I'm an asshole, :flipoff2: but i thought it might be different being for my wife.

​​​​​​
 

FJC11

Asshole
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May 24, 2020
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1318
Messages
2,097
If I say I'll be there , I will be there unless a legitimate emergency happens , real shitty that people would commit than throw you a bullshit excuse for a no show.

I would remember that and you would be off future invite lists.
 

ridenby

Red Skull Member
CAL4
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183
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445
Location
Kentucky
I like being invited to things. I very rarely attend, I always thank for the invite, and bow out.
 

Crashhawk

That Guy
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753
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122
Location
Ky
I've learned not to judge people off what I would do in a given situation. Most people are flaky twits, only concerned with their own convenience. So that's what I expect them to be.
I do what I do, that's what makes me what I am. They do what they do. They ain't me.
 

Bamajeeper

Feed me!
Joined
May 21, 2020
Member Number
836
Messages
250
I've learned not to judge people off what I would do in a given situation. Most people are flaky twits, only concerned with their own convenience. So that's what I expect them to be.
I do what I do, that's what makes me what I am. They do what they do. They ain't me.

What he said.
I never turn down free food.
People suck these days at committing to simple things.
 

4Eyedturd

Well-known member
Joined
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1725
Messages
104
Location
Waco, TX
If you invite me unless the wife and kids really want to go, I’m not coming. I’m not a social butterfly like some of y’all. If you call and say you need help doing XYZ, you can count on me being there 100%
 

Tin Roof

Rusted
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728
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Location
Iowa
My wife has extreme social anxiety and we’ve bowed out on events at the last minute multiple times because of it. We don’t get invited to many things anymore.
 

Sterlingfire

ignant
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687
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the soon to be USSA
Did you really have to invent her friends, then make excuses why her invented friends couldn't show up? :flipoff2::lmao:

People are shitty... just don't try to make a huge effort to show up to any of their shit i guess? If you're wife's accomplishment doesn't mean that much to them, then they must not be real good friends. Sucks, but it might be a one way street with them.
 

Wildcat

Great Northern Snowback
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521
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North of the 42nd
I throw a house party every year for all the guys/gals at work. First two years everyone was invited. Then I started cutting out the no shows. Seeing as this is a military establishment the crew is always changing so the new members get the invite.
After doing this for a few more years I got called into the CO's office. He was newly posted in and his secretary complained she wasn't on the invite (she just wanted an excuse to suck up). I explained that for two years in a row she ghosted the party with no rsvp so she's out. He laughed and said good enough for him.

13 yrs later, retired and a civilian contractor now and i still do it. Now I only give one strike though.

If I'm invited to something I will respond if I can or cannot make it. I don't give a reason. I owe people nothing.
 

D Nelly

professional dingdong
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May 20, 2020
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595
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406
Location
CT
If I say I'll be there I'll be there. If I know something will be hard to get to I'll let the person know and drop in for a few minutes if I can. Can't stand no shows
 

M92PV4U

Tach'dout
CAL4
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110
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2,738
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D.p. Ca.
I don't go. I let people know when they invite me that I'm not going to make it and thank them for the thought.
 
Joined
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AZ
s3-news-tmp-127306-screen_shot_2019-09-05_at_9.16.55_am-2x1-940.png
 

FJC11

Asshole
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I don't go. I let people know when they invite me that I'm not going to make it and thank them for the thought.

And that's how you do it , courtesy goes a long way .
 

YotaAtieToo

Thick skull
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If I say I'll be there , I will be there unless a legitimate emergency happens , real shitty that people would commit than throw you a bullshit excuse for a no show.

I would remember that and you would be off future invite lists.

The one couple had a legitimate excuse to be late, I still think they could have showed, but I don't know all the details of the shit that was going down. But like I said, they flake on everything anyway. Especially if it's plans the girl and my wife make.

The other couple didn't even bother to make an excuse.

I sent a kinda dick message out to them last night. No response yet.

Like I said these are supposed to be close friends, this wasn't a kids birthday party or something where a ton of people get invited, we really only invited so many people.
 

Rttoys

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340
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253
Location
Waller, TX
I understand if you can’t make it, but if you rsvp that you’ll be there and flake, unless you have a damn good excuse, you’re out. On the same hand, like stated before, if you get multiple invites and you always decline, you are off the list, too. Way too many people flake these days without remorse. It takes work to put a good party on and when you are planning food, it’s even worse.

The best part is when they cancel at the last minute because “my wife is sick”, then look on their facespace and they are at the beach or something. :rolleyes:
 
Last edited:

YotaAtieToo

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Also, concerning this specific situation, had they supposedly not been able to make it, they could have sent my wife a text or something during when they knew the party was going.
 

Aggie06

I ain't the one to blame.
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Do you think all of the COVID panic affected some of the people not showing up?

Most of our friends are spread around the state, so we only get together on rare occasions. We try to make stuff that we’re invited to, but will let people know pretty far in advance if we can’t.
 

YotaAtieToo

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I understand if you can’t make it, but if you rsvp that you’ll be there and flake, unless you have a damn good excuse, you’re out. On the same hand, like stated before, if you get multiple invites and you always decline, you are off the list, too. Way too many people flake these days without remorse. It takes work out out a good party on and when you are planning food, it’s even worse.

The best part is when they cancel at the last minute because “my wife is sick”, then look on their facespace and they are at the beach or something. :rolleyes:

The couple that always flakes was my best man and his wife who supposedly adores my wife.

We have pretty much given up on inviting them to to anything, but the wife always tries to make plans with my wife, anything from going camping to meeting at the park for an hour. Flakes at the last minute every time.

​​​​​As far as inviting them again, we don't really do stuff like this, so it's not like they're off a list. We have been talking for years about doing a 10 year wedding anniversary party, which is next June. After today, I'm really wondering if it would be a waste of time.
 

YotaAtieToo

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Do you think all of the COVID panic affected some of the people not showing up?

Most of our friends are spread around the state, so we only get together on rare occasions. We try to make stuff that we’re invited to, but will let people know pretty far in advance if we can’t.

No, we don't hang out with sheep :flipoff2:​​​​​​

Everyone invited has been to events and parties recently.

Even if that were true, it wouldn't be an excuse to say you're coming and then flake.
 

Aggie06

I ain't the one to blame.
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No, we don't hang out with sheep :flipoff2:​​​​​​

Everyone invited has been to events and parties recently.

Even if that were true, it wouldn't be an excuse to say you're coming and then flake.

Mayne they just aren’t that into you. :flipoff2:


Totally agree with that. Hell, it’s not like a simple text saying we can’t make it isn’t sufficient.
 

Rttoys

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Waller, TX
The couple that always flakes was my best man and his wife who supposedly adores my wife.

We have pretty much given up on inviting them to to anything, but the wife always tries to make plans with my wife, anything from going camping to meeting at the park for an hour. Flakes at the last minute every time.

​​​​​As far as inviting them again, we don't really do stuff like this, so it's not like they're off a list. We have been talking for years about doing a 10 year wedding anniversary party, which is next June. After today, I'm really wondering if it would be a waste of time.

Hate to break it to you, but the wife hate y’all and to keep peace, your buddy sides with her, so he gets to see the pussy once a year. :( when she finds a better dick and leaves, he will be back to normal.

Toss up on your anniversary party. My parents had a big ass party for their 50th last year. A lot of people that said they were suppose to be there and flaked, but it was still a big hit. Well over 100 people there, including one of the pastors that was at their wedding and most of the wedding party.
 

YotaAtieToo

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Mayne they just aren’t that into you. :flipoff2:


Totally agree with that. Hell, it’s not like a simple text saying we can’t make it isn’t sufficient.

I always figured that maybe they didn't like me, which I really don't give a flying fuck anymore. But my wife is nothing but a good friend, I figured they could make the exception.

​​​​​​
Hate to break it to you, but the wife hate y’all and to keep peace, your buddy sides with her, so he gets to see the pussy once a year. :( when she finds a better dick and leaves, he will be back to normal.

Toss up on your anniversary party. My parents had a big ass party for their 50th last year. A lot of people that said they were suppose to be there and flaked, but it was still a big hit. Well over 100 people there, including one of the pastors that was at their wedding and most of the wedding party.

It's the other way around really, I actually like his wife more than him. She and my wife get a long great, but she is just a flake.

That's awesome. We got married kinda young (23) and although I still think we did a great job on the wedding without spending a ton of money, we completely screwed up planning the reception.

Sun starts to go down, older people are leaving, beers are coming out, music.................. No lights....... :confused: apparently the venue didn't have out door lighting and we didn't think to ask :laughing:

Not to mention the way your friend and family circle changes for 23 to 33. It would be fun, can't let a hand full of people ruin it.
 

HillbillyDeluxe

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When my ex-wife and I lived in Tucson, we always hung out with a good friend of mine and his wife. Then when they moved to the opposite side of town, there was always an excuse why they couldn't come out to our place, then they had a baby and acted almost like driving anywhere to do anything was a bige deal (but would go other places without issue). Finally we just stopped trying to hang out with them, and they never tried to talk to us any more. They made other friends that were parents I guess. This was back in my late 20's.

Nowadays my wife and I see this stuff with others that are our age (mid-late 30's). Hell a good friend of mine lives on 9 acres behind me and I haven't seen him but once in almost a year. They didn't even bother to show up for my son's 2nd bday party, made some lame excuse about being busy and found out that was a lie.

People are flat out just flaky shitheads.
 

Will12785

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Syracuse, NY
No friends = no invites. Just the way I like it.

A member here invited me over in August, I will be there. That will most likely be my only personal social interaction of 2020.
 

Lawless

A turd in the herd
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When we are invited we go even if just for a little while because something came up.

A few years back we hosted a Superbowl party we invited around 20 people total and did it a couple months in advance. We spent the entire day before food prepping and when the time came a total of 4 showed up.:mad3:

To say those that didn't show ever get invited over ever again is an understatement.
 

YotaAtieToo

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When my ex-wife and I lived in Tucson, we always hung out with a good friend of mine and his wife. Then when they moved to the opposite side of town, there was always an excuse why they couldn't come out to our place, then they had a baby and acted almost like driving anywhere to do anything was a bige deal (but would go other places without issue). Finally we just stopped trying to hang out with them, and they never tried to talk to us any more. They made other friends that were parents I guess. This was back in my late 20's.

Nowadays my wife and I see this stuff with others that are our age (mid-late 30's). Hell a good friend of mine lives on 9 acres behind me and I haven't seen him but once in almost a year. They didn't even bother to show up for my son's 2nd bday party, made some lame excuse about being busy and found out that was a lie.

People are flat out just flaky shitheads.

This is a whole other deal, we have a handful of friends who don't have kids. We used to hang out with them quite a bit even after our first. Lately it seems they don't invite us anymore, I'm not sure if they just think we won't go because we have kids, or maybe they just don't want kids at the party.

Honestly, I don't really care, we aren't the type to get offended if we aren't invited to something. It is what it is.
 

Truckedup

My reality is insanity
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507
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At the Y
If invited by people I know, I go.....But my woman companion prefers not to...She would rather invite freeloader relatives to our place..I dislike people who show time after time, bring nothing but boring stories and eat all food....
 
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