3 bonehead stories over the years...
First up, I got a warning. I was in HS, and in my old Suburban with a bunch of friends (we were band nerds, not getting into anything). We just picked up my GF and were debating whether or not to go to Blockbuster or to go to one of the girl's houses and just watch one of their hundreds of VHS tapes. We stopped at a T-intersection in the neighborhood at the stop sign, I put it in park, and we debated (right turn was Susan's, left turn was Blockbuster). Finally, it was decided to just go to Susan's place and watch one of her family's vids. I put it in D, put on the signal, and pulled out. There was a hill about 150 feet to the left, and I could see headlights approaching... in a 25 mph zone. The moment I pulled out, the vehicle got airborne over the hill, landed right behind me and damned near plowed into me... then hit the blue lights. Yup, pulled over and harassed a bunch of kids because he was hot-doggin' and jumped his car at night, nearly killing a bunch of teenagers.
Next up... Motorcycle Officer Monty McCurry. I remember this name to this day. He had a buddy of mine pulled over in the church parking lot when he ran out in the street to flag me down into the parking lot. Claimed I was speeding in a school zone. It was February. It was in the 20s outside. I was in a 79 C20 Suburban with CA emissions that hated the cold. It was teacher inservice day, so we were let out at a half day. This dumbass cop thought it would be easy pickin's for his "performance goal" (quota) to pull over random kids. Being a cold-blooded vehicle, I had the TH400 in L1, and was revving the piss out of it to keep it from stalling. The fan was roaring in the cold, but I was going maybe 12 mph, tops. He ticketed me for careless driving, and then claimed in court that I was going 45, accelerated to 60 and made a dangerous pass. The judge knew (small town) what vehicle my family owned, and knew about his penchant for BS ticket to HS kids. It was tossed.
The third was an MP in 1998. I was about to PCS to Korea, so I had been packing my shit all day. I was tired, and I went to bed. It was about 2330 on a Saturday night when everyone in the barracks came banging on my door to take them on a beer run before the 7/11 stopped selling at midnight. I agreed, and three of them hopped in my 4Runner to head out for beer. Coming back to the barracks, I came around the final curve in a 25 zone, where I saw 2 MPs with a car pulled. I slowed further to about 18 mph, and one of them made a u-turn. Coming toward me, he flashed his high beams... I did nothing, you can't bait me that easily. He then whipped around behind me and pulled me over in the barracks parking lot. He claimed I was going 43 mph! He ran my license and it came up suspended, so I was arrested and brought to the station. The entire time, the drunks were cussing and trying to fight the MP, but I kept my cool, got them in the building and went voluntarily. I was pulled from the holding cell after about 20 minutes by the desk sergeant. He said my license was suspended for failure to provide proof of insurance. Having just PCSed from Ft Campbell, he knew TN (where my license was from and my home of record) did not require insurance on a vehicle at the time. He released me, right when all the drunks showed up at the station to protest the wrongful arrest of a safe, sober driver (gotta love drunk soldiers). As for the 43 mph? The rookie (Private) MP had his early model radar set in stationary mode, so it added his 25 mph and my 18 mph. And the suspension, of course, was some wires crossed with communications, as someone's license number that matched my SSN was suspended in VA, whereas TN didn't use the SSN for a license number, and VA did. So they suspended my SSN and it cross-referenced to my DL number, even though the SSN was the DL number that was suspended. Talk about a monkey-fuck to fix in the courts.
