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Lil Deuce 40s

Deuce 40s

Deuce 40s

Yogurt Slinger
Joined
May 19, 2020
Member Number
156
Messages
396
Loc
NC
My wife is having a little guy. :laughing:

I just found out today we're having a boy, I'm pumped as shit. Mrs. Deuce is 13 weeks pregerts, I'm almost 37, what could go wrong. :eek:

It'll be our first kid and we have a plethora of bad examples within the extended family to figure out WTF to do. Still, I'm nervous as shit.

So far we've got 13 weeks of continuous dry heaves and anxiety pinned down. The wife is doing ok too. :laughing:
 
Congrats! We had our first last year at 35. Be ready for sleepless nights and sore knees once they start moving.
 
Aggie06 said:
Congrats! We had our first last year at 35. Be ready for sleepless nights and sore knees once they start moving.
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The wife has been on research duty trying to figure out a way to maintain some sleep cycle. All the cousins in the family run rampant at all hours of the day/night. We're not putting up with that. :laughing:
 
Rules and consistency worked for us. 2 boys that are damn good kids. Bedtime is bedtime when they were small has helped keep them in a routine.


And your pull out game is weak...:flipoff2:
 
Yep, my thoughts on raising a kid were having firm, fair and consistent rules. Three things to go by to raise good kids. Congratulations. I've got three and they are all pretty damn good kids.
 
Deuce 40s said:
The wife has been on research duty trying to figure out a way to maintain some sleep cycle. All the cousins in the family run rampant at all hours of the day/night. We're not putting up with that. :laughing:
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I’m going to be honest, we’ve been real lucky with getting to sleep through the night for several months now. Our daughters naps can be tricky during the day, but we have a set bedtime for her, and it seems to work.
 
Congratulations!

Consistency is the key to a sleep schedule.
Keeping them in their routine is important.

Had our first at 37, he is mostly well behaved.

Best thing to ever happen to us.

It is easy until they become mobile.
 
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Congratulations :beer:

I was 35 when our first was on her way. I remember looking skyward at some point early on and asking, “Me... a father? Do you REALLY think this is a good idea?”

We never read a book, watched a video, took a class on parenting (at least Mrs had changed a diaper before). We went on some suggestions from our folks, and total gut instincts. We now have two amazing young women who are trying to navigate through this crazy world we are in now, and they are doing just fine ☺️

Naps are your friend, take them when you can

If you don’t already know how a kitchen works, learn. Mrs will need lots of good foods for her and Jr to be as healthy as possible, and she will not feel like doing much around food at times
 
nahmus said:
Do you get along with this henry guy?

:flipoff2:
Congrats!
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:laughing:


The hard part I think will be having to parent my wife's mom. She's damn near ruined my sister in law's 5 year old boy. We can barely stand to be around the kid. The boy gets very little discipline at home and zero discipline at the grandparent's house.

How is everyone treating ipads and TV time for little ones? We're of the opinion that is doing the most damage to this kid as it's used as a babysitter 99% of the time. You should see the temper tantrums when he's told to put it down. :eek:
 
Pyleit said:
Rules and consistency worked for us. 2 boys that are damn good kids. Bedtime is bedtime when they were small has helped keep them in a routine.


And your pull out game is weak...:flipoff2:
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Yes, exactly. Many people have made comments about our boys and how they willfully go to bed every night at 8pm. There's zero argument.

We did cry it out with the first one. It was a horrible experience. The second one we tried something different that worked in three nights. NEVER co-sleep, don't even start that crap, and keep your kids to a bed time. If not it will wreck your marriage.

To the OP, congrats and welcome to the club! :flipoff2:

If you raise your kids how you were raised (don't be afraid to be hard on them), and don't turn into a giant, modern pussy like most people have, you'll be A-okay. :laughing:
 
Deuce 40s said:
:laughing:


The hard part I think will be having to parent my wife's mom. She's damn near ruined my sister in law's 5 year old boy. We can barely stand to be around the kid. The boy gets very little discipline at home and zero discipline at the grandparent's house.

How is everyone treating ipads and TV time for little ones? We're of the opinion that is doing the most damage to this kid as it's used as a babysitter 99% of the time. You should see the temper tantrums when he's told to put it down. :eek:
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It's not grandma's fault. Just remember that.

You'll be fine.

We limited time on those things for a long time, but my boys got into video games and playing stuff like Roblox and Minecraft. It's a love-hate relationship in my opinion. My boys know that when we go on vacation (which is usually into the mountains and accompanied by off roading), there's no electronics, because there's no service of any kind. They don't bitch or whine or cry. They leave them at home and they enjoy nature. Likewise, if we do a whole day of hiking they're fine with nothing. My parents don't have internet so when they stay the weekend there, they have nothing. Neither seems to mind.

We did over a week in South Dakota, and they only mentioned wanting to watch YouTube once. Their addiction to modern conveniences is great when it comes time to laying down the law. Nothing hits them worse than taking away all electronics when they've been little bastards. :grinpimp:

EDIT: Just remember that schooling, work places, everything is headed towards modern technology. It's inevitable. Showing your children that they don't need those things 24/7 is the key in helping them maintain a healthy relationship with electronics.
 
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Grats man. I was in my mid 30s when we had ours.

We do minimal screen time. I put a 1h movie on a couple days ago, but I can't remember the last time I put a movie on. He just wants to be outside. "looking for deer poop" is his favorite thing. In fact, my folks are talking him camping tonight in the "bus". But yea, screen time is bare minimum. He has his moments, but nothing to fret about. He gets his time outs, a swat on the butt if its something he should know better.

My inlaws do a lot of screen time. my wife's brother raise their kid just like your inlaws. He watches about 8h of TV a day with no discipline. None. They were so relieved when after a few "specialists" they finally had one say he was "on the spectrum". So now that's their copout.

So yea, screen time, I think, is very damaging.

Once he arrives, everything changes. Its weird. All the stuff you thought that was a big deal, isn't. I used to think a flat tire or dead well pump would ruin my day. Now I just shrug my shoulders. The kid puts everything in perspective.

Have fun with it man.
 
Try to absorb and remember everything. You will raise your best friend. Then you will send him out on his own. You will have 100% of his trust, his love and his growth. You will be his first hero.

Try not to lose it - nothing is too big to deal with, without losing those 3 things.

It's tough to live up to.

5 kids, youngest is 14. Life with them has been a blur. Now I am getting used to life without them. It's not easy.
 
Congrats. It’s funny that sleep schedule is what new parents are worried about. Infants are easy. Be consistent and put the kid down and in its own bed and that will work itself out.

The reality is that kids and parenting get more challenging by the day. The older the kid, the bigger the challenge.
 
Congrats!


Grendel said:
Try to absorb and remember everything. You will raise your best friend. Then you will send him out on his own. You will have 100% of his trust, his love and his growth. You will be his first hero.

Try not to lose it - nothing is too big to deal with, without losing those 3 things.

It's tough to live up to.
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And this. But be careful, it won't always be fun to be the "bad guy" when discipline is needed, but it's necessary (especially if the wife always wants to play the good cop). You'll feel like shit sometimes, but hold the line, and you'll get what Grendel is saying.
 
Icono said:
Congrats!




And this. But be careful, it won't always be fun to be the "bad guy" when discipline is needed, but it's necessary (especially if the wife always wants to play the good cop). You'll feel like shit sometimes, but hold the line, and you'll get what Grendel is saying.
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Thing is, if the rules are communicated 100% and held, you keep all, even when explaining why you have to enforce the rules and then doing it.

My kids wanted to know why and they wanted me to be fair.

They want and have my love, attention and life's focus.
 
Both of ours go to bed and don't move until morning. Its like flipping a breaker off. I'm guessing its having set bedtime and never co-sleeping. They had a little portable crib and stayed next to our bed when infants and were doing the "up every couple of hours feeding" thing, but as soon as that stopped they slept in their rooms.

Congrats. I was 40 when we had our 1st one.
 
Crawl Away said:
Congrats. It’s funny that sleep schedule is what new parents are worried about. Infants are easy. Be consistent and put the kid down and in its own bed and that will work itself out.

The reality is that kids and parenting get more challenging by the day. The older the kid, the bigger the challenge.
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I guess it's because some of our friends bitch about being tired all the fucking time. We're trying to have solutions before the problems get here.

Some friends have been able to maintain their way of life, in going out to stores or dinner and traveling. That's what we'd like to do. My sister in law can't do any of that.
 
Yea, ours slept next to our bed for the first night. After that, in their own bed. Did just fine. He's been getting up lately and climbing into our bed around 4am though. Trying to squash that.

Potty training just isn't happening either. I've done ice cream, chocolate, a movie, anything to bribe him. Just won't shit in the toilet. :homer:
 
Deuce 40s said:
I guess it's because some of our friends bitch about being tired all the fucking time. We're trying to have solutions before the problems get here.

Some friends have been able to maintain their way of life, in going out to stores or dinner and traveling. That's what we'd like to do. My sister in law can't do any of that.
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That's another thing, take them everywhere from day one. My son was 3 weeks old the 1st time he went out to a restaurant. Just takes a little planning... we went right after he got up from nap and was fed... he stayed in the carrier... wife was ready to bail to the car with him in case he started crying. 5 years later, we got a 5 and 3yr old that never cause problems going out.
 
45acp said:
That's another thing, take them everywhere from day one. My son was 3 weeks old the 1st time he went out to a restaurant. Just takes a little planning... we went right after he got up from nap and was fed... he stayed in the carrier... wife was ready to bail to the car with him in case he started crying. 5 years later, we got a 5 and 3yr old that never cause problems going out.
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Yep, same here. I went to a HD dealership when he was about 2. He didn't touch any of the bikes. I take him everywhere. We were at the hardware store the other day for 30m in the plumbing section. Outside of the poor bloke that needs to pull the fifty 3/4 fittings out of the 4" PVC, kiddo did alright.
 
Deuce 40s said:
I guess it's because some of our friends bitch about being tired all the fucking time. We're trying to have solutions before the problems get here.

Some friends have been able to maintain their way of life, in going out to stores or dinner and traveling. That's what we'd like to do. My sister in law can't do any of that.
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The sleeplessness is fleeting and having a plan helps. But only if both parents follow it. We have done everything we wanted to do a took our kids with us. My oldest shipped and rode in the car and went to dinner and was never treated as a handcuff while he was little. However, we would start crying when my wife took him to hobby lobby. :laughing:

Because of sports for # 1 and 2, #3 has been luggage her whole life until COVID. She was trained to be on the go and loves it and the people that git to hold her when she was little at all of the events.

My sisters raised rigid kids that couldn’t function because they made rigid nap times and rigid diets and rigid bed time processes.
 
Deuce 40s said:
:laughing:

How is everyone treating ipads and TV time for little ones? We're of the opinion that is doing the most damage to this kid as it's used as a babysitter 99% of the time. You should see the temper tantrums when he's told to put it down. :eek:
Click to expand...

We haven’t given ours any kind of iPad. She’s still a little to young for that. We might have a TV on for noise, but our daughter doesn’t sit down and watch it.
 
And one more thing... if the baby is real bad colic then throw all this advice out the window and be prepared to go to bed every night crying with a shotgun in your mouth. That was our little girl the 1st 6 months and we both have serious ptsd from it to this day.

:laughing:
 
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