Stupid Law Enforcement stories

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    Stupid Law Enforcement stories

    So, to preface this, my old man was a highway patrolman. I try and be respectful and not act like a jackass. However...


    I get pulled over last night for 82 in a 70. I know damn well I was only doing 75, but told her I deserve the speeding ticket as I was speeding. Hand her the DL, registration, explain I need a second to pull a current insurance card on my phone as I haven't been pulled over in years (electronic insurance card is completely legal in MT). Granted, that 7 mph takes the ticket from $20 to $40, but it's $20 so fuck it, I'll take the speed I get as I was speeding. There are no court fees, appearance, nothing but pay the fine and you're done so it's a small thing.

    I was then met with a barrage of stupidity.

    "How long has it been since you've smoked meth!?, How about POT?!"

    I had to play 20000 questions, all because she described me as "nervous". Any LE can tell you 99% of the normal people they pull over for speeding will be slightly nervous as they rarely have to interact with LE. If they don't give any other indicators, and there is nothing suspicious, there's no probable cause and nothing worth getting worked up over. I didn't feel nervous, but she was getting me paranoid with her attitude after a few minutes.

    I ended up answering questions for 20 minutes on the side of the road. The same 5 questions over and over. Refusing a search (I don't need all my tools and junk strewn in the ditch), and telling her to find her probable cause, write the speeding ticket, and I'll be on my way.

    I was threatened with a drug dog search (this county actually has a decent dog) and told her she was more than welcome to run the dog around. The fact that she was acting threatening about walking a dog around the truck amused me and she didn't appreciate my laughing at it. This was met with the response of "it'll be a few hours before it can get here..." We're in a county with 2 highways and maybe 1000 people in the entire county, 10 miles from the county seat and her office. The only reason it takes more than 15 minutes is the dog is on the other side of the county.
    There are 6 people in this department, and I already knew 5 of them on a first name basis from the service calls I've done for their building. I have to get a current background check that has to come back squeaky clean to work in their office, so they end up pulling it every few months. She mentioned she'll be looking at my background check about 10 times in 10 minutes, and I kept telling her it was a quick read, with about 10 speeding tickets over 18 years.

    She decided after 20 minutes I wasn't worth her time, and let me go with a warning on the speed and a warning that "if I ever pull you over again we're going to be searching everything, I don't care that you haven't ever been arrested for whatever you're doing". Which really made me wonder if she couldn't have made the speed stick and never even had her radar on in the first place.

    I drive a beat to death chevy 3500. Just like 90% of the people on the road here that are mainly ranchers. Nothing about my truck screams any profile other than broke white guy. There was an AR in the gun rack, and a pistol I threw up on the dash (pulled mags as I stopped and tossed on the floor). She never mentioned them, or seemed to take notice. Just kept staring at my Milwaukee tool bags like they were her next new truck.


    I ended up calling her boss today (sheriff, who's office I wired) and filing a complaint about her complete lack of professionalism and utter ineptitude. In a time when LE is already under scrutiny, the incompetent ones keep upping their stupidity level.
    His response was a sigh and a "I'll have another talk with her" which tells me it's been a common thing.




    In reality, I just needed to bitch because it's frustrating knowing how many good and professional LE's are out there doing a thankless job, and it just seems the idiots are trying their hardest to bring them all down. Every single other time I've been pulled over it's a simple "need to see the paperwork, ok... sit tight" and then they come back with the ticket and "don't be stupid" and I'm on my way.

    #2
    I don't have many, most of my dealings with LEOs have been fine, if anything I've gotten off light for shit I should've been arrested for (120 in a 55 was one). The only really bad/annoying contacts I've had were all with the same Pierce County deputy.

    First time I met Deputy Dipshit he pulled me over for speeding, which I was, but there was no chance in hell he had any way to prove it. He was crossing through a 4 way intersection from my left to my right, about 1/8th mile ahead of me when I crested a hill that would've blocked his view till then. Super cop pulls me over about a mile down the road and asks if I knew how fast I was going, his claim was about 10mph faster than reality. Then he starts nit-picking my trimmed fenders being too sharp, and my mud flaps that were beyond legal being too small. He "let me off" with a warning because he knew none of it would stand up in court.

    Next time I met him was after a guy at a party I'd just arrived at accidently shot his sister, got a solid screaming at about buying underage kids beer (I didn't) and driving drunk (I wasn't).

    Then the guy got a massive hard-on for my roommate, fucker would always drive 10-15 mph past our house just looking for a reason to pull in, especially if the shop door was open because we were clearly up to something. Now, my roommate was a bit of a fuckup but he wasn't exactly a menace to society at that point either.

    Comment


      #3
      Originally posted by Chevy_man View Post

      I was then met with a barrage of stupidity.

      ........ This was met with the response of "it'll be a few hours before it can get here..." We're in a county with 2 highways and maybe 1000 people in the entire county, 10 miles from the county seat and her office. The only reason it takes more than 15 minutes is the dog is on the other side of the county.
      There are 6 people in this department, and I already knew 5 of them on a first name basis from the service calls I've done for their building. I have to get a current background check that has to come back squeaky clean to work in their office, so they end up pulling it every few months. She mentioned she'll be looking at my background check about 10 times in 10 minutes, and I kept telling her it was a quick read, with about 10 speeding tickets over 18 years.

      She decided after 20 minutes I wasn't worth her time, and let me go with a warning on the speed and a warning that "if I ever pull you over again we're going to be searching everything, I don't care that you haven't ever been arrested for whatever you're doing". Which really made me wonder if she couldn't have made the speed stick and never even had her radar on in the first place


      They can’t make you wait an extended amount of time for the dog. They have 10 minutes

      (Well they CAN make you wait, they have a gun, what are you going to do about it, but it’s not legal and should get tossed in court)

      Rodriguez v. United States,
      Last edited by grumpy356; 07-07-2020, 12:32 AM.
      I've been falling so long it's like gravity's gone and I'm just floating

      Comment


        #4
        I really don't understand why any LEO who has no respect for our rights is allowed to remain in uniform.

        The last time I got pulled over I was 19 years old, leaving Philly on the turnpike. I was doing 95mph in a 65mph zone. The cop got to the window and asked, "Do you know why I pulled you over?" I replied, "I was going entirely too fast." Haha! He was dumbfounded. About ten minutes later he comes back and says, "You're lucky I have an accident to go to. I gave you a non-moving violation. Slow down."

        Comment


          #5
          I ended up calling her boss today (sheriff, who's office I wired) and filing a complaint about her complete lack of professionalism and utter ineptitude. In a time when LE is already under scrutiny, the incompetent ones keep upping their stupidity level.
          His response was a sigh and a "I'll have another talk with her" which tells me it's been a common thing.
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          We had part of a Slinky. But I straightened it.

          Comment


            #6
            Originally posted by Chevy_man View Post
            ticket from $20 to $40, but it's $20 so fuck it, I'll take the speed I get as I was speeding. There are no court fees, appearance, nothing but pay the fine and you're done so it's a small thing.
            What. in the actual fuck.

            Comment


              #7
              The last time I got pulled over the cop said my tag lights were out. I got his name and shield number. Went home and saw that both tag lights were working. I called the police station and asked to speak to the shift supervisor. I told him my story and he wanted me to drive to the station for him to look at it.
              I said no. I just cracked open my first beer.

              Comment


                #8
                Originally posted by Chevy_man View Post
                ...His response was a sigh and a "I'll have another talk with her" which tells me it's been a common thing...

                Basic work rule #1
                If you are really good, you will be assigned all the work.

                Sheriff's work code/ethic #1
                If you are really good, you will get out of it-
                ​​​

                Comment


                  #9
                  The old saying is absolutely right about bad apples and the bunch...a couple bad cops make every one of them look like bad cops.

                  Comment


                    #10
                    Originally posted by Chevy_man View Post
                    So, to preface this, my old man was a highway patrolman. I try and be respectful and not act like a jackass. However...


                    I get pulled over last night for 82 in a 70. I know damn well I was only doing 75, but told her I deserve the speeding ticket as I was speeding. Hand her the DL, registration, explain I need a second to pull a current insurance card on my phone as I haven't been pulled over in years (electronic insurance card is completely legal in MT). Granted, that 7 mph takes the ticket from $20 to $40, but it's $20 so fuck it, I'll take the speed I get as I was speeding. There are no court fees, appearance, nothing but pay the fine and you're done so it's a small thing.

                    I was then met with a barrage of stupidity.

                    "How long has it been since you've smoked meth!?, How about POT?!"

                    I had to play 20000 questions, all because she described me as "nervous". Any LE can tell you 99% of the normal people they pull over for speeding will be slightly nervous as they rarely have to interact with LE. If they don't give any other indicators, and there is nothing suspicious, there's no probable cause and nothing worth getting worked up over. I didn't feel nervous, but she was getting me paranoid with her attitude after a few minutes.

                    I ended up answering questions for 20 minutes on the side of the road. The same 5 questions over and over. Refusing a search (I don't need all my tools and junk strewn in the ditch), and telling her to find her probable cause, write the speeding ticket, and I'll be on my way.

                    I was threatened with a drug dog search (this county actually has a decent dog) and told her she was more than welcome to run the dog around. The fact that she was acting threatening about walking a dog around the truck amused me and she didn't appreciate my laughing at it. This was met with the response of "it'll be a few hours before it can get here..." We're in a county with 2 highways and maybe 1000 people in the entire county, 10 miles from the county seat and her office. The only reason it takes more than 15 minutes is the dog is on the other side of the county.
                    There are 6 people in this department, and I already knew 5 of them on a first name basis from the service calls I've done for their building. I have to get a current background check that has to come back squeaky clean to work in their office, so they end up pulling it every few months. She mentioned she'll be looking at my background check about 10 times in 10 minutes, and I kept telling her it was a quick read, with about 10 speeding tickets over 18 years.

                    She decided after 20 minutes I wasn't worth her time, and let me go with a warning on the speed and a warning that "if I ever pull you over again we're going to be searching everything, I don't care that you haven't ever been arrested for whatever you're doing". Which really made me wonder if she couldn't have made the speed stick and never even had her radar on in the first place.

                    I drive a beat to death chevy 3500. Just like 90% of the people on the road here that are mainly ranchers. Nothing about my truck screams any profile other than broke white guy. There was an AR in the gun rack, and a pistol I threw up on the dash (pulled mags as I stopped and tossed on the floor). She never mentioned them, or seemed to take notice. Just kept staring at my Milwaukee tool bags like they were her next new truck.


                    I ended up calling her boss today (sheriff, who's office I wired) and filing a complaint about her complete lack of professionalism and utter ineptitude. In a time when LE is already under scrutiny, the incompetent ones keep upping their stupidity level.
                    His response was a sigh and a "I'll have another talk with her" which tells me it's been a common thing.




                    In reality, I just needed to bitch because it's frustrating knowing how many good and professional LE's are out there doing a thankless job, and it just seems the idiots are trying their hardest to bring them all down. Every single other time I've been pulled over it's a simple "need to see the paperwork, ok... sit tight" and then they come back with the ticket and "don't be stupid" and I'm on my way.
                    Originally posted by TrikeKid View Post
                    I don't have many, most of my dealings with LEOs have been fine, if anything I've gotten off light for shit I should've been arrested for (120 in a 55 was one). The only really bad/annoying contacts I've had were all with the same Pierce County deputy.

                    First time I met Deputy Dipshit he pulled me over for speeding, which I was, but there was no chance in hell he had any way to prove it. He was crossing through a 4 way intersection from my left to my right, about 1/8th mile ahead of me when I crested a hill that would've blocked his view till then. Super cop pulls me over about a mile down the road and asks if I knew how fast I was going, his claim was about 10mph faster than reality. Then he starts nit-picking my trimmed fenders being too sharp, and my mud flaps that were beyond legal being too small. He "let me off" with a warning because he knew none of it would stand up in court.

                    Next time I met him was after a guy at a party I'd just arrived at accidently shot his sister, got a solid screaming at about buying underage kids beer (I didn't) and driving drunk (I wasn't).

                    Then the guy got a massive hard-on for my roommate, fucker would always drive 10-15 mph past our house just looking for a reason to pull in, especially if the shop door was open because we were clearly up to something. Now, my roommate was a bit of a fuckup but he wasn't exactly a menace to society at that point either.
                    These posts:

                    Sheeeit. I was walking down the sidewalk, you know with my pants hanging around me thighs and my Hanes showing for all the world to see. I was throwing gang signs at my homies, and I had my shirt hanging over my shoulder to display my gang tats. In my backpack, NWA's 'Fuck the Police' blared loudly, to indicate my support for my BLM homies. I have 3 teardrops hanging from my eye, indicating the work I put in for my gang.

                    Then some pig walks up to me and asks me to turn down the music. Sheeeit. I knew it was wrong, blaring hateful music, but that's the way a homie gotta roll. Then the cop said some shit aobut crack and a Nine, fuck that she ain't searchin' my pants.

                    Pigs man, Golly Gee Willikers I dislike them intensely.
                    Pull up your fucking pants, straighten your fucking jalopies out, stop looking like a piece of shit methhead, spend less money on tattoos, and don't drive 85 mph, and maybe your trailer trash asses won't get hounded by the cops.

                    Comment


                      #11
                      Originally posted by Chevy_man View Post
                      So, to preface this, my old man was a highway patrolman. I try and be respectful and not act like a jackass. However...


                      I get pulled over last night for 82 in a 70. I know damn well I was only doing 75, but told her I deserve the speeding ticket as I was speeding. Hand her the DL, registration, explain I need a second to pull a current insurance card on my phone as I haven't been pulled over in years (electronic insurance card is completely legal in MT). Granted, that 7 mph takes the tickSNIP CRIMINAL THINKING BULLSHIT
                      ssional LE's are out there doing a thankless job, and it just seems the idiots are trying their hardest to bring them all down. Every single other time I've been pulled over it's a simple "need to see the paperwork, ok... sit tight" and then they come back with the ticket and "don't be stupid" and I'm on my way.
                      You are very clearly up to something wrong and it shows in every word. Very rarely do we see such a large mass of pre-emptive criminal denial on [that other letter edit removed] IBB. Most guys around here are past their shenanigans phase, so your post is like a flashing red warning light mounted on top of a wailing siren.

                      You are completely full of shit somehow, not exactly sure how, but you are a poor bullshit artist.
                      Last edited by evernoob; 07-07-2020, 07:11 AM.

                      Comment


                        #12
                        Several years ago working out of town in Northern VT driving 3 hours home on Friday afternoon on the interstate.

                        I approach a construction zone and slow down to the posted 55. This zone has been here all summer, I'm well aware of it. It is still 2 lanes at this point. It eventually goes down to 1 lane. I'm driving in the right lane going the speed limit like a normal human being. A construction truck comes out of the emergency median turn around crosses the two southbound lanes and goes into the breakdown lane to accelerate until it's up to speed to merge into traffic. I work in heavy civil construction, this is proper protocol. I move to the left lane to give the truck space. He pulled out with ample room, not cutting me off or anything. I get about 100 yards from the median turn around in the left lane and a detail county sheriff following the truck just pulls out into the left lane RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME and doesn't accelerate to highway speed. He is to follow the truck for his detail. However he stays in the left lane doing about 40. I'm now on his ass, because you know, he pulled right onto the interstate in front of an oncoming vehicle; so I move over to the right lane as to not crowd the sheriff. Problem is, construction truck just moved into the right lane not going the speed limit either. Sheriff pulls up to my door while I'm behind the truck he is supposed to be behind screaming at me to pull over. I comply. I get screamed at for crowding a construction vehicle for a good 3 minutes. I didn't argue, I explained I work in the construction field and just got off work heading home. Dude is RED in the face, screaming, over weight, etc. I just let him finish his rant, until he got back in his car and left. No information exchanged, nothing.

                        Super cop needed to not cut out in the left lane of the interstate under the speed limit and should have been following the truck he was assigned to detail with into the breakdown lane until they both accelerated to speed.

                        Comment


                          #13
                          The worst experience ive ever had with cops was recently. Now, mind you, ive had lots of run ins with cops over the years for speeding and driving clapped out crawlers on the highway, so im comfortable around them. Also i usually talk my way out of tickets 4/5 times, but i understand that sometimes i dont win the battle.

                          Anyways, on a thursday, BLM was in our smallish town blocking traffic, spray painting everything, pissing everyone off and the cops stood by and didnt do shit. Whatever, i get whats in the air. Friday, Im driving my Chevy K5 build into a gas station and this dick head pulls me over for through traffic through an adjoining business parking lot. Whatever. Fucker pulls out the measuring tape and measures the height of my frame rails from the ground, front and back. Came back and said my front was good, but my back was 3" too high for my weight class. Ok. Writes me a ticket for "Defective equipment". Ok, no big deal, ive gotten plenty of those before. fuck tells me HE HAS TO TAKE MY PLATES! WTF? There antique plates! Theyre permanent. Nope, fucking dick head tells me "ITS THE LAW!" asks me if i want to take them off or him. I told him to get his fat ass out there and take them off. I totally flipped a switch and called that mother fucker every name in the book. Stupid retard couldnt get my front plate off since it had 9/16" bolts going through it. So the fucker JUST GETS IN HIS CAR AND DRIVES OFF! LEAVES ME WITH ONE PLATE!!???!!

                          Just fucking defund them all at this point. Fuck it.

                          Comment


                            #14
                            Typically Sherriff’s deputies are pretty cool guys, it is the Police Department officers that think they’ve got something to prove.

                            Most of my interactions with them have been driving related, a buddy on mine and I had Ducatis in college and zero respect for speed limits. Double or triple was common.

                            Usually they were pretty cool when we actually stopped for them.

                            Biggest “dickhead” police encounter I remember was a ticket for not having headlights on. I had just pulled out of a parking lot onto a road that was lit up Light a football stadium. About 200’ down the road I realized my lights weren’t on and flipped the switch. Cop saw me do it and pulled me over. I told him I’d just turned out of that parking lot, which he said he saw, and wrote me the ticket anyway.

                            Was pulled over another time for “illegal tint” which 95% of vehicles in FL have, I think it was 3% too dark, and told I needed to have a rear bumper on a pre-runner style truck. There are trucks here with a bumper made of wood.



                            I’ve actually supported them more the last couple of years since they started being randomly targeted and attacked, rather than just thinking they were out to hassle people for minor traffic violations. I have to admit with the crap going on lately though that I’m more likely to argue with them if they try to give me some stupid ass ticket like a tag light out. They need all the good will they can get at this point.
                            Last edited by Gatorgrizz27; 07-07-2020, 07:27 AM.

                            Comment


                              #15
                              In HS I was at a buddies house watching movies. I head home and it's past curfew. I forgot to call my mom, so I stopped at a gas station pay phone quick (.5mi from home).

                              As I hang up a cop pulls up and flips the lights.

                              My car was a POS (had to buy it myself so whatever) so I get that.

                              She asks to search my car so I let her (I know better now).

                              She finds a baseball bat in the trunk (next to a glove and baseballs) and detains me for a weapon and hauls me to the station (1mi away). At least she didn't have my car towed.

                              After about an hour at the station, handcuffed and sitting on a bench, she calls my mom. 30min later she shows up and I could tell she's pissed.

                              The cop explained what "the situation", then my mom just UNLOADED on the cop; I actually felt bad for the lady. Lol

                              We leave, my mom drops me off at my car, and I was never bothered by that particular police department again.

                              Thanks mom! 🤣

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