Do you go to things your invited to?

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    Do you go to things your invited to?

    If someone invites you to an event, like something that is planned in advance, food is provided, ect, do you your best to make it?

    I don't mean like, "hey I'm having a BBQ later I invited everyone I know, you should swing by" but something more personal.

    How about canceling, what kind of situation does it take for you to cancel?

    My wife graduated with a bachelor degree this year, she took some time off to raise our boys, but decided to go back after a 6 year hiatus after a fire took out our town and we had plans to move out of the area. She did 2 semesters while still having to be a full time mom of 3 boys (1, 2 and 7) and running her photography business.

    Her parents, sister and I decided to throw a surprise graduation party for her. We invented about 30 of her closest friends and family weeks in advance.

    One friend drove 4 hours by herself with a 6 month old baby.

    Another buddy woke up early this morning, drove 30 mins, worked 4 hours drove 30 mins home then 45 mins back to the party.

    Out of the 3 couples we invited that are supposed to be our closer friends, 2 said they'd be there and 1 said they would try.

    The one who said she would try invited my wife up to see their new house on Thursday(about 90 mins way up in the middle of nowhere) . My wife being the woman she is, packs the 3 boys up and heads out, just to hang out for a few hours.

    This chick says she can't make it to the party since they "just drove down the hill" and 2 trips in 2 days would be too much. Then turns around and invites my wife to come up there next weekend,

    Another couple were supposed to be there and just said they couldn't make it this morning, which I'm pretty sure was only because we had to change locations from my in laws place to my sister in laws place because in laws place ac broke and it was 100* today.

    Last couple had a semi legitimate excuse, some wack job in their rural neighborhood was threatening people with a gun and had some type of standoff with the cops. However, these people have more guns than anyone I know, so I'm sure they were safe.

    It also ended before the party was over, and they still didn't bother to show. They also basically flake on any plans anyway.

    Anyway, sorry for the rant.

    I was just curious how everyone else is with events.

    I'm the type where if I'm invited to something, I try my hardest to make it. Even if it's just a "hey we'll be camping here, swing by, but especially a circumstance like this, it's not a holiday weekend or something where you might have other plans. I just feel like if someone thought of me when they were going down their list, the least I can do is show up.

    Then, once I say I'll be there, I'm going to be there unless a family emergency comes up. I absolutely hate flaking, but if for some reason I have to, I will at least call and tell them I can't make it and why. Instead of just not showing up.

    Do people not realize that food was bought for them because they said they'd be there?

    Does anyones word mean anything these days?


    I would have expected this for an event for me since I'm an asshole, but i thought it might be different being for my wife.

    ​​​​​​

    #2
    If I say I'll be there , I will be there unless a legitimate emergency happens , real shitty that people would commit than throw you a bullshit excuse for a no show.

    I would remember that and you would be off future invite lists.

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      #3
      I like being invited to things. I very rarely attend, I always thank for the invite, and bow out.

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        #4
        I've learned not to judge people off what I would do in a given situation. Most people are flaky twits, only concerned with their own convenience. So that's what I expect them to be.
        I do what I do, that's what makes me what I am. They do what they do. They ain't me.

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          #5
          Originally posted by Crashhawk View Post
          I've learned not to judge people off what I would do in a given situation. Most people are flaky twits, only concerned with their own convenience. So that's what I expect them to be.
          I do what I do, that's what makes me what I am. They do what they do. They ain't me.
          What he said.
          I never turn down free food.
          People suck these days at committing to simple things.

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            #6
            If you invite me unless the wife and kids really want to go, I’m not coming. I’m not a social butterfly like some of y’all. If you call and say you need help doing XYZ, you can count on me being there 100%

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              #7
              My wife has extreme social anxiety and we’ve bowed out on events at the last minute multiple times because of it. We don’t get invited to many things anymore.

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                #8
                Did you really have to invent her friends, then make excuses why her invented friends couldn't show up?

                People are shitty... just don't try to make a huge effort to show up to any of their shit i guess? If you're wife's accomplishment doesn't mean that much to them, then they must not be real good friends. Sucks, but it might be a one way street with them.

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                  #9
                  I throw a house party every year for all the guys/gals at work. First two years everyone was invited. Then I started cutting out the no shows. Seeing as this is a military establishment the crew is always changing so the new members get the invite.
                  After doing this for a few more years I got called into the CO's office. He was newly posted in and his secretary complained she wasn't on the invite (she just wanted an excuse to suck up). I explained that for two years in a row she ghosted the party with no rsvp so she's out. He laughed and said good enough for him.

                  13 yrs later, retired and a civilian contractor now and i still do it. Now I only give one strike though.

                  If I'm invited to something I will respond if I can or cannot make it. I don't give a reason. I owe people nothing.
                  Searching before posting will reduce dumb ass questions from you, but may not stop dumb ass responses from me.

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                    #10
                    If I accept an invitation, I go.

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                      #11
                      If I say I'll be there I'll be there. If I know something will be hard to get to I'll let the person know and drop in for a few minutes if I can. Can't stand no shows

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                        #12
                        I don't go. I let people know when they invite me that I'm not going to make it and thank them for the thought.

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                          #13
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                            #14
                            Originally posted by M92PV4U View Post
                            I don't go. I let people know when they invite me that I'm not going to make it and thank them for the thought.
                            And that's how you do it , courtesy goes a long way .

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                              #15
                              Originally posted by FJC11 View Post
                              If I say I'll be there , I will be there unless a legitimate emergency happens , real shitty that people would commit than throw you a bullshit excuse for a no show.

                              I would remember that and you would be off future invite lists.
                              The one couple had a legitimate excuse to be late, I still think they could have showed, but I don't know all the details of the shit that was going down. But like I said, they flake on everything anyway. Especially if it's plans the girl and my wife make.

                              The other couple didn't even bother to make an excuse.

                              I sent a kinda dick message out to them last night. No response yet.

                              Like I said these are supposed to be close friends, this wasn't a kids birthday party or something where a ton of people get invited, we really only invited so many people.

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